stretch, reach, get scared

Let's be clear one one thing: I am terrified. I have recently made some very big decisions about my life and my business, and I think there are a few more big ones on the way, too. And as much as I would love, absolutely love, to sit here and tell you that it's great, and I'm sure it'll work out, and I know that I did the right thing...the truth is I have no idea. For so long, I thought big decisions were a matter of pros and cons, lists and reason, a slow decision come to carefully after much deliberation. What has become clear to me in the past few years, as Dot & Lil grows and I do too, is that the truth is little less perfect and a lot more messy. There's a little more hopeful blind jumping to a well-led life and a growing business than I had previously imagined. A lot more informed guessing than thoughtfully listed pros and cons, it turns out.

So. I am scared. But in this particular case, I believe it's a good kind of scared. A healthy kind of terror, if you will. I take it to mean that I'm growing. As a business person, as a person in general, as a person who is trying very hard to lead a life that I love. Just as surely as outgrowing my clothes as a kid meant that I was growing, feeling like I'm out of my comfort zone with Dot & Lil is a sure sign that my business is growing.

After all, if I keep doing what I've always done, I'll keep getting what I've always gotten, correct? And this little soapmaker is ready for big things.

I'm off to worry in my bed, about all the big, scary, exciting things I can't wait to do! Goodnight!